quotations about pregnancy
True, the reason you don't have to worry about getting pregnant is because you're already pregnant, but hey -- you don't have to worry about getting pregnant. If you're a frisky pregnant lady, that's a perk to enjoy.
SABRINA JOY STEVENS
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"10 Necessary Mantras For Women Who Hate Pregnancy", Romper, September 21, 2016
As I watched my belly grow, on one hand, I was self-conscious. Being pregnant felt dangerously similar to being fat. It sent me back to shame and regret, feeling like I was out of control, like I was in a car accident and was skidding slowly toward something I had already hit over and over again.
SHAUNA NIEQUIST
Cold Tangerines: Celebrating the Extraordinary Nature of Everyday Life
In the pregnancy process I have come to realize how much of the burden is on the female partner. She's got a construction zone going on in her belly.
AL ROKER
attributed, Oh Baby, I'm Having a Baby!
Envy the kangaroo. That pouch setup is extraordinary; the baby crawls out of the womb when it is about two inches long, gets into the pouch, and proceeds to mature. I'd have a baby if it would develop in my handbag.
RITA RUDNER
Naked Beneath My Clothes
All the time we wondered and wondered, who is this person coming, growing, turning, floating, swimming deep, deep inside?
CRESCENT DRAGONWAGON
attributed, Postcards from the Bump
You are pregnant and you are powerful. You are bold and you are beautiful. Go forward in your boldness, in your beauty and in your contentedness. Trust your body to birth and know that the collective power of women worldwide will be with you.
ANONYMOUS
It is now quite lawful for a Catholic woman to avoid pregnancy by a resort to mathematics, though she is still forbidden to resort to physics and chemistry.
H. L. MENCKEN
"Minority Report", Notebooks
All the earth is made anew--
Far the false, and fair the true--
Where a little life begins,
Free of sorrow, free of sins,
And Baby comes.
MARY CLEMMER AMES
"When Baby Comes"
Yes, pregnancy is wonderful and beautiful and all of those great, magical things, but it's also scary and kind of gross and, well, like every horror movie I have ever seen.
JENNIFER GERMANO
"12 Moments When You Realize Pregnancy Is Exactly Like A Horror Movie", Romper, September 28, 2016
The first pregnancy is the most self-indulgent thing in the world because you get massages and prenatal yoga and hypnotherapy CDs. During this one I forget that I'm even pregnant. I'm hoisting my 2-year-old around.
EMILY BLUNT
"Anne Hathaway Is the Epitome of Perfect Spring Fashion in First Post-Pregnancy Red Carpet Appearance", E Online, May 13, 2016
Some women prefer not to think too hard on the choices they make during pregnancy, which can lead to its own set of problems, and some women treat the whole thing rather like a homework assignment. They count all calories and steps. They avoid all deli meat like the plague. They overcook their steaks and use a thermometer on their vegetables. They judge the other pregnant lady (me) who may steal a sip of her husband's beer. They weigh themselves daily and worry, worry, worry about how fast they're gaining weight.... If you take the job of growing a human too seriously, you'll burn yourself out before the baby comes out and the really hard part begins: parenthood.
GEORGI BOORMAN
"8 Ways To De-Stress Your Pregnancy", The Federalist, October 3, 2016
Pregnancy can be a magical, wonderful time, when you may experience a dramatic improvement in your general health, and feel unusually happy, harmonious and healthy, a pattern which may continue in subsequent pregnancies.
MIRANDA CASTRO
Homeopathy for Pregnancy, Birth, and Your Baby's First Year
Morning sickness ranks high on the list of "Least Favorite Pregnancy Symptoms," right along with sore breasts and crying at insurance commercials. Morning sickness, which is, of course, all day and night sickness (ever woken up in the middle of the night to dry-heave? It's pretty rad) affects up to 90% of all women during the first three months of pregnancy. It can range from mild nausea here and there to "toilet, you're my only friend" level puking. Some have it for just a few months, while other poor souls can have it for their entire pregnancies. Some can eat whatever they want without a problem, while for others just thinking the word "fish" can send them running to the nearest bathroom. But no matter what kind of morning sickness you have, we can all agree that it sucks big time.
MEREDITH BLAND
"Morning Sickness During Pregnancy Is Actually A Good Sign", Scary Mommy, September 27, 2016
You may hate being pregnant, but the minute the baby is born, she is God's precious child, given to you as a gift.
SANDRA DALLAS
A Quilt for Christmas
The shamans are forever yacking about their snake oil miracles. I prefer the real McCoy, a pregnant woman.
ROBERT HEINLEIN
Time Enough for Love: The Lives of Lazarus Long
Pregnancy is a disease from which you recover in 18 years and 9 months.
CARRIE LATET
attributed, Oh Baby, I'm Having a Baby!
Pregnancy demonstrates the deterministic character of woman's sexuality. Every pregnant woman has body and self taken over by a chthonian force beyond her control. In the welcome pregnancy, this is a happy sacrifice. But in the unwanted one, initiated by rape or misadventure, it is a horror. Such unfortunate women look directly into nature's heart of darkness. For a fetus is a benign tumor, a vampire who steals in order to live. The so-called miracle of birth is nature getting her own way.
CAMILLE PAGLIA
Sexual Personae
Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to conceive.
DON HEROLD
Strange Bedfellows
If I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished every moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
ERMA BOMBECK
Reader's Digest, 1982
How can I have morning sickness when I don't get up till noon?
RITA RUDNER
attributed, Oh Baby, I'm Having a Baby!